Conversation First Date

A first date to a woman is a look into your life; it lets her get to know what dating you would be like.  If your date is boring and the same old thing, she’s going to think dating you are going to be boring and predictable as well.  You do not want to be boring and predictable, but fun and spontaneous.  You need to have good conversation on the first date.  Think of things from her perspective, if she’s very attractive then she’s used to guys being really boring and serious on a first date, grilling her interview style.  You do not want to be one of these guys!

The worst thing you can do with your conversation for the first date is to have a serious interview style date.  "So where do you work?."  "What do you do for fun?"  Do not do that!  Instead it’s better to make observations and guesses rather than ask questions.  So if you’re stuck on what to say make an observational guess, and she will then fill in the information.  For example "You have a nice body you must workout or play sports."  She would then be like "yeah I do actually I run three times a week, and I used to play volleyball in college, I loved sports." 

Try to have fun in the situation your in.  Be in the moment with her, and enjoy what’s around you.  Girls love a guy that’s fun, and that can make them laugh.  If you can't make them laugh that’s fine, just make sure your carefree and in the moment with them.  Do not be in your head constantly thinking of what to say next, or trying to impress her.  You will come off as try hard with you conversation on the first date if you do this.   

Next what you want to do is do what’s called screening her.  This is where you can ask questions seeing if she lives up to your standards.  The thing that guys will do wrong is to not have any standards; they go out on a date seeing if the woman will accept them, when in reality it should be the other way around.  A bulk of the conversation on the first date should be seeing if the girl has the qualities you look for.  Just because she is attractive does not mean you should become submissive and see if she will accept you.  Its what’s called having standards for the women you date.  Write down a list of all the personality qualities you want in a woman, and then straight out ask her.  For example I only like girls who are smart, so ill ask her, So are you smart?.  Develop standards for yourself, and she will be attracted to that.  

So lets summarize what you've learned so far when it comes to conversation on the first date.  You have to be the fun guy, not the boring predictable guy.  That means amusing yourself and playing around.  Next is making statements when you can rather than ask questions.  This is called cold reading; this is when you, based on observation, say what you think about the girl.  Make sure to be in the moment, that means staying out of your head and thinking what to say, be in the moment and lets the words arise naturally.  Lastly develop standards for yourself and screen the girl.